I'm here to sell you dreams, not anything of any value!

How To Become A Total Loser And P*ss Your Money Away On The Internet!

This program has a 100% SUCCESS rate!!!!

NEVER REAVEALED SECRETS!

I'm sure that if you adopt the secret methods revealed in this ebook and the sh*tty videos I'm going to send you are guranteed to fail in gaining riches, love and happiness.

I'm so sure I'm offering a 1 hour money back guarantee if you are not a total failure within the hour!

I really live in a shack in Arkansas, my wife is my 50 year old second cousin and I drive a rusty old truck!

If you think any of these things are actually mine mine you're more gullible than I first thought!

So why should you trust me?

I'm an expert in failure, no I'll go further than that, I am a fcuking GURU!

A picture of me

BUY NOW!

Here's why I'm qualified to coach you in failure

I call myself a Guru
I've been on the Internet 5 fcuking minutes
I have consistently failed at everything I have ever done
I've bought loads of sh*t like this and KNOW it doesn't work
I've squandered thousands of my own money to prove it!!!!

So who is my "How Not To Make Money On The Internet Program" for.

If you are..

Well below normal intelligence
Have no experience or knowledge of business
Really believe it is possible to make money without doing a scrap of work
Get turned on by stupid phrases like "Make Money On Auto Pilot
Don't spell well, don't know the Correct place to use capitals, and have little understanding of grammer
Have no real talents or abilities

Then this program is for YOU!!!!!

If you spend your days daydreaming, if you want to give up your shitty day job, if you're close to bankruptcy , if you're stupid enough not to realize that the only thing I'm selling you hear is a fcuking dream...

Then this program is for YOU!!!!!

BUY NOW!

What you'll need to get started on my get rich quick (sic) program is;

An Internet connection (this is very important for budding internet millionaires like us)
A computer (also crucial)
Neither the intelligence or ability to create a real business

It's time to start LIVING THE DREAM!

Yes, you can quit your shitty job and work from home!!!

Yes, you can make no fcking money just like me!!!!!

Yes, you are going to make no fcking money trying to pass cr*p like this of as having any really value.

BUY NOW!
What are you waiting for you moron!

There's nothing in it!

I AM GOING TO TEACH YOU HOW TO

Knock together a badly designed, gawdy and misspellt website like this (don't worry if you have no skills, I managed to do it, so can you!)
Put videos onto your pages of your fucking ugly face and use the drawl in you voice to really p*ss off anyone who's unfortunate enough to unwittingly land on your scam site. AND as a BONUS how to sound like a condescending know all even though you know fcuk all!
Write like a dork
Sell on the cr*p others produce
How to dupe people into giving them your email address so you can pester them
How to SPAM
How to alienate you family by trying to sell them cr*p
Fake Google Adsense payments like this...

How to create impressive looking charts that are not based on any real information whatsoever

And here's the best thing yet!!!!!

I am going to teach you how to make...

really

...long fcuking web pages like this!!!!! Cool huh!!!!

What Are you waiting for!!!! GO ON YOU KNOW YOU WANT TO!!!!!

Here's what some losers who bought this garbage had to say!

"Wow man fcking awesome. I've never SUCCEEDED at anything before, but thanks to you I've been a total SUCCESS at failure!"

Chuck NY

"Where have you been all my life! Before I bought your program I had way to much money, a house, kids a wife. Now I've got nothing and never felt better. Cool."

Jimmy GA

"I was jobless with a few $'s in my pocket when I dicovered your program. Now I'm jobless and broke."

Mike OR

"You're so cool. I really want to sleep with you!"

Your Mom, Nowheresville

BUY MY SH*T NOW!

Satirical web design by Gandy-Draper - All donations will be spent in our local bar!